Loving Speech Can Heal the World, I think so.

Loving speech has the power to heal systemic and individual karma. Allow me to explain by starting with some definitions. Karma is the boomerang opportunity to learn and experience a lesson attracted to your soul. A karmic contract means you are doing this dance with another soul that has complimentary lessons, making the two of you perfect for an exchange. Because karmic contracts between people and ideas are charged with emotion, they often result in a rift, separation and/or distance because people can't seem to agree, or get on the same page. In many cases, this distance is perpetuated by ego, fear and skill capacity. For example, we may feel "right" in our knowing and unwilling to walk the bridge of connection (ego). We may be fearful of rejection and therefore tentative to approach a difficult person or conversation (fear). We may also lack important skills in identifying and expressing feeling such as empathy, listening, and conscious collaborative dialogue (skill capacity). There can be of course other reasons why this occurs and I'm sure we can all identify situations where this has happened- estranged family relationships, stark political divides and cultural differences. Unfortunately, as long as we stay away from walking the vulnerable bridge of communication towards someone or something, we perpetuate separateness. The solution? I say loving speech.

I can think of nothing worse than separateness. In my reflection and initiation of writing this blog another mass violent incident occurred in the United States. This incident, further inspired and reinforced the concept that loving speech is the vehicle that brings hard, painful, difficult and uncomfortable people and ideas together for an opportunity. The opportunity to be together in earnest vulnerability is the magic where new ideas can be created with common goals of solution. It's impossible for people to stand on opposite sides of a street ignoring the needs and thoughts of another and somehow still reach a solution. Impossible. Karmic resolution doesn't resolve itself through avoidance, blame or righteousness. Karmic resolution resolves itself through compassionate action towards mutual goals of peace.

The problem is not differing values of ideas, the problem is the method in which humans seek to resolve those differences. Sit with that for a moment and reflect on the methods, or lack thereof, that you employ to repair relationships with others during conflict. Do you choose loving speech because the relationship is most important, or do you seek to create differences because your point of view is most important?

What is loving speech exactly? I would say it is a type of mindful, strategic, compassionate communication dedicated to discovering solution through common ground. Loving speech happens when we are committed to relationships more than we are committed to our ego. For those of you willing and ready to resolve karmic contracts personally and globally, here's a couple of strategies for conscious loving speech.

• Stay rooted in a desire to resolve
• Remain out of judgement
• Seek to understand, not to prove right or wrong
• Look for common ground between you
• Take really good care of your own emotions and triggers
• Be mindful of stories and projections you tell yourself 
• It is okay to be afraid
• Proceed with mindfulness 
• Breathe 
• Remind yourself of your intention

I don't have any special advice on how to fix dramatic rifts of separateness in people, especially those with differing values, because it requires the free will of your own permission to be vulnerable. This is something we cannot force others to do. We can however, model it. By modeling brave, loving speech, we can teach and inspire those in our home to do the same. By being responsible for our part, we can teach one person at a time. Spreading it from the inside out. It's as if we're opening our hand and saying "I don't understand you, and perhaps I don't agree with you, but I am with you as one human family, and I am committed to resolution." 

It takes tremendous courage to do this.

Since we only have the power to control ourselves, it is quite possible this progressive method falls on deaf ears. What should we do if we're the only one making the effort? Focus. Allow whatever reaction that comes back to you to be a reminder of the critical need for this skill. Make peace with your effort, offering, and willingness, and wish hopefulness on those not yet there. Brene Brown says that we have to give others permission to practice vulnerability; which is often imperfect, especially if it's new to them. But we have to start somewhere, and allow others to start wherever they are too.Your intentional action creates the bridge that perhaps the other person may be inclined to walk over in a future situation. Paving the road is a first step. How would anyone get there without a path? I say this because the alternative is bleak. It's what we currently do: stand and point fingers, avoid difficult conversations, and therefore reinforce separateness.

"We want freedom of speech, but we're all talking at the same time. We say we want peace, but nobody wants to change their own mind, no they don't. And it goes on and on and on for a thousand years......Is love enough, or can we love some more?"-- Michael Franti

Wishing you inspiration and courage to practice loving speech. You deserve peace, we all do. Let's take that step together.